Wednesday, September 26, 2007

love and chemotherapy


(bailando debajo de un mariposa -- Tucson, Az. 2007)


"I can't sleep. There's a woman stuck between my eyelids."
-- Eduardo Galeano

There are some things you expect during chemotherapy: fatigue, nausea, hair loss, etc. falling in love isn't one of them.

I remember reading a July post on Joshua Lilienstein's blog. In case you're not familiar, he's a med student at USC that's also a testicular cancer patient (though given all that he's been through, I'm hesitant to compare our scenarios anymore the the generalization i just gave you). Anyway, in his July 3 blog post, he notes taking a break from seeking advice from some of the nations top doctors to attend a wedding in San Francisco. At the event he met a young lady and briefly described the joy and support she'd brought into his life that otherwise would have been a very dark period.

I remember thinking the guy was amazing when I read his post. to find love and a companion in the middle of something like chemotherapy.

on Aug. 16, Guadalupe Rocio Chavez flew out from Los Angeles to visit me in Tucson and her grandfather south in the town of Amado.

her visit was brief: just four days, but our time together sparked something neither one of us expected, or were even seeking. Funny, though because in hindsight neither of us were totally surprised -- we've known each other for seven years -- and this new feeling and relationship is very much welcomed.

she returned to Tucson two weeks later with my parents (she accompanied them on the eight hour drive from L.A. to Tucson -- how's that for a trial by fire!) when she walked in the door my heart and soul leaped. that week of chemo. wasn't bad and I know it was her love and support that helped make it so.

my aunt maria and cousin gabby came to Tucson that week as well. it was obvious to them, whom had never met lupita, that something was afoot.

seriously, who starts a relationship in chemotherapy? the human body is already frail, tired and irritable. the normal things you appreciate, like dancing, certain foods, bike rides and late nights, are temporarily out of grasp. but our days and nights together, whether it was at the cancer clinic, the san xavier mission for mass or sitting at the kitchen table, were so wonderful.

there was a reason i could rise each morning, with little sleep, for chemo and feel strong as they connected my IV to the drugs.

the photo above is something we created the night before she left Tucson.
every day this week the nurses have said that I look tired. and every time they tell me that, i smile to myself and just nod, keeping my little secret that it's not the sleeplessness that makes me seem so. it's because my companera isn't nearby.

18 comments:

Stephanie said...

I'm happy for you George...for the positive results you've been getting from the chemo...and for the love you have found during it all. That really is great. It's amazing what love can get you through. :)

On a side note...I went to high school with a Guadalupe Rocio Chavez from Los Angeles. I haven't seen her in ages and I'm not sure if she's the same one but I thought that was kind of random and funny.

the cancer blogs said...

hey steph -- did you go to ramona?

Stephanie said...

Yup. The one run by nuns...not the other one people called "the bad girl school." haha. Class of 2000.

Johnny Hawk said...

That's great news mi tio! Keep fighting the fight. Sending healing energy your way. Paz y amor.

the cancer blogs said...

I mentioned you to guadalupe -- she said she remembered two stephanies -- both were goth...

Paul Contreras said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Paul Contreras said...

Aww love:

"I will remember the kisses
our lips raw with love
and how you gave me
everything you had
and how I
offered you what was left of
me..."

Bukowski

Stephanie said...

There were actually 4. 1 was goth and I did hang out with her and a few other goth chicks in our school off and on but I dunno if I was considered one. :) I was the chubby one with long brown hair if that helps.

Nathan Olivarez-Giles said...

Awwwww.....look at that picture. You and your mujer are a beautiful couple, man. You deserve the best and Lupe seems mos def worthy of the best status. I'm happy for you homie

Philthy said...

The Truth: George had to have chemo before he could find a girl! Why you ask? Because at full strength, George is too much for any mortal woman. His machismo has been fermented, distilled and concentrated by his "caliente" Guatemalan genes. It take weeks of radiation before his body is weakened enough to be susceptible to our petty emotions of love and the like.
He is Cain Marko, The Juggernaut (that's a metaphor). There is a girl in San Francisco who George, "had relations" with without being the least bit weekend by earthy poisons. She just rocks back and fourth, struck dumb by the banality of everyday life after 'knowing' the true Whorge Manchez. I say we keep him under chemo at all times. I'm not sure the world can take the shear, white light of beauty that shines from his ever-present spirit, on all who know Him.

I for one, salute George and his new love. And may he lay pipe in ways that make the nymphs blush.

Hell yeah George! And remember...
If you're not splittin' it, you're not hittin' it.

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